Caregiver suggestion protocol please

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Percolator
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Caregiver suggestion protocol please

Post by Percolator »

My sweetheart is newly enrolled in RE-Code.
I am floundering in being trusted as her advocate.
I’m running out of gas attempting to stay positive.
All tasks are in my court. I dearly love this woman. Much of what I attempt to promote (Apollo Health oriented) is resisted. My sweetheart’s ability to reason is shot, therefore, logic doesn’t exist.
Help!
Percolator in Oregon
Alexia C
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Re: Caregiver suggestion protocol please

Post by Alexia C »

Percolator wrote: Mon Oct 24, 2022 6:29 pm My sweetheart is newly enrolled in RE-Code.
I am floundering in being trusted as her advocate.
I’m running out of gas attempting to stay positive.
All tasks are in my court. I dearly love this woman. Much of what I attempt to promote (Apollo Health oriented) is resisted. My sweetheart’s ability to reason is shot, therefore, logic doesn’t exist.
Help!
Percolator in Oregon
Hello Percolator,

Welcome to our forum!

I am so glad you found us and I hope we can provide the support and guidance you are looking for. I see from your post you have enrolled your sweetheart with the ReCODE program. As I am sure you are well aware, ReCODE is a clinically proven program that assists in reversing cognitive decline most effectively in the early stages, although reversal has also been observed for mid to late stages. You are getting one of the best, if not the BEST, support available out there. I have no doubt you will begin to observe improvements as you move forward with the protocol and the love you have for her will help you find the strength to stay positive during the most challenging moments. Other members in this forum are likely to share their experiences and post some suggestions.

As a welcome intern, I would like to point out some links/resources that might be helpful as you explore the site further. The Primer includes researched-based prevention strategies. It has been written by Stavia, a practicing M.D. with ApoE4/4.

Some helpful tips to navigate the site include the How-To Guide. It includes topics such as navigating the forum, private messaging, and searching. One great tip is using the quote (") button when replying to a post. Using the button will automatically alert the member of your response.

If you are interested in learning more about other members check out Our Stories. You might find other members with experiences similar to yours that can steer you in the right direction.

Again, I am so glad you joined our forum. I look forward to hearing from you in the future. Please feel free to reach out with any other concerns or inquiries. There are always moderators or members of the forum that can shed some light or guidance.

Warm regards,

Alexia C
Functional Medicine Certified Health Coach
TLS
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Re: Caregiver suggestion protocol please

Post by TLS »

I find using humor help to convince my mother to try something. I also do not argue as it's pointless because the reasoning abilities are not usually with her. I get rather creative sometimes. Mostly what works for me is listening to her complaints and trying humor. I created a 'cheat sheet' of sorts that lists out all the vitamins and lifestyle things for her to do along with the reason why. This has helped a lot with the supplement list. She really likes it. Some of the other things I have tried but also know that I can't force her to something she doesn't want to do. I have to see I can get her to thing it is her idea.

Peace to you.
apoe 3/4
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JML
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Re: Caregiver suggestion protocol please

Post by JML »

Percolator wrote: Mon Oct 24, 2022 6:29 pm My sweetheart is newly enrolled in RE-Code.
I am floundering in being trusted as her advocate.
I’m running out of gas attempting to stay positive.
All tasks are in my court. I dearly love this woman. Much of what I attempt to promote (Apollo Health oriented) is resisted. My sweetheart’s ability to reason is shot, therefore, logic doesn’t exist.
How wonderful that you are supporting your sweetheart in this! Are you doing parts of the program with her? Eating the same food? Fasting at the same time? Exercising with her? Stimulating your brain--maybe together? Prioritizing sleep? Sometimes if it can just become "the way you live" at your house, it is easier to accept.

I also agree that humor can help! And becoming a master of improv! The answer is always "yes, and..."

Good luck and good health to both of you!
Julie
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NF52
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Re: Caregiver suggestion protocol please

Post by NF52 »

Percolator wrote: Mon Oct 24, 2022 6:29 pm My sweetheart is newly enrolled in RE-Code.
I am floundering in being trusted as her advocate.
I’m running out of gas attempting to stay positive.
All tasks are in my court. I dearly love this woman. Much of what I attempt to promote (Apollo Health oriented) is resisted. My sweetheart’s ability to reason is shot, therefore, logic doesn’t exist.
Help!
Percolator in Oregon
I think your "sweetheart" is lucky to have you in her corner--even when she's being a pain the you-know-what! I'll pass along some advice from a woman who was in a somewhat similar situation with her mother and her very frustrated teenaged children. She told them "Her memories and reasoning may be gone, but her feelings are still here and very real, so that's what we're going to respect and support." So they went with the flow when the tide was going against them, and gently steered when her mom's mood and feelings allowed it, which happened more once her mom felt less anxious about changes.

I won't pretend to know exactly how that might look with your loved one, so will give some examples that you might adapt. As a 70 year old woman with a strong family history of dementia on my mom's side, I've told my husband that he better use a playlist of songs I like to get me to do things, because singing along to music gives me joy! And since I have never wanted to eat sardines, I doubt I will start if I can't reason--but I expect I'll enjoy a varied diet of fruits and vegetables, other kinds of fish, some healthy grains and healthy fats like avocados, almond butter and other nuts. Maybe not a perfect ReCODE diet, but pretty close to a good Mediterranean diet.

It's easier to go on a walk when it's in a park, than in a gym, especially if the leaves are turning or there's little kids and dogs to enjoy watching. And I would much prefer that he set up times that my friends can take me for that walk, so that he has time to do what he loves and so can stay afloat during these ebbs and flows of my moods.

Rather than think of ReCODE as an all-or-nothing commitment, why not try something that seems close to your sweetheart's experience. For example, it she's insisting on an evening snack, make it something a bit healthier than she might have had before and maybe breakfast is a tiny bit later in the morning. A 10-hour "fast" is still a fast!

Most of all, allow yourself to be her "care partner" and only choose to be her "advocate" for the issues when she can't advocate for herself--health care, financial issues, etc. As a partner, you can look for things that bring you both joy and that lessen your own, very real burden. Ask others to pitch in--people often don't know what to do, but if you say "Can you come over and help her sort out her winter clothes?" I bet a wonderful friend would love to do that, and you'd soon hear them laughing and reminiscing together.

I got to see some of Oregon (Astoria, Cannon Beach, Portland, the Cascade Valley) last year for the first time. You have both a sweetheart and a beautiful state and are entitled to some peace and joy from both.

Best wishes from the state of Virginia,
Nancy
4/4 and still an optimist!
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