My year of anxiety and insomnia

Newcomer introductions, personal anecdotes, caregiver issues, lab results, and n=1 experimentation.
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Chrisweides
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My year of anxiety and insomnia

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Hello fellow people,

I posted here before and I am very grateful for the kind and helpful answers and tips I got.

Sadly, either mental illness (depression and anxiety) which I am suffering from for many years or perimenopause or my hashimotos has gotten the best of me last year and I have had the most terrible year of my life.

All through it, my mum, now the third foremother of mine to fall to dementia (likely AD although none were ever officially diagnosed, however my great grandmother was severely affected and my mum shows pretty typical signs), shows more and more cognitive decline. It is so hard for me to see for various reasons and she absolutely refuses to acknowledge there is a problem much less get treatment. She has been physically active and very social all her life, is only 76 and it makes me so so afraid I will go the same route.

I cannot unmake my past but I have always eaten a bad diet (I think), am still very addicted to sweets although I try to limit myself to one small sweet after lunch and, worst of all, am depressed and ocd/anxiety prone since I was 12. I always hated exercise and I still do, but I walk a lot instead of driving and always did my back protection exercises at least.

Now I thought I can throw the wheel around yet at 50, started to eat better (mediterranean, very little sweets, whole grains instead of empty etc.) and exercise more. And then this year happened!

And I feel doomed. I tried a lot of medications, none of which really helped. I do sleep hygiene, I spent a lot of money on snake oil sellers, I am on HRT…nothing helps, I can’t sleep and this dread feeling is with me all night and sometimes in the day. By now I am so sleep deprived any mental or physical exercise is really exhausting and hard to do.

I am putting all my hope in the medical industry because I feel my Alzheimer risk is sky high and I can’t do anything about it what with the anxiety and insomnia. I don’t know what broke last spring but it was something major.

Sad greetings, Chris
51 years old. APO E3/4. Mother, grandmother and great grandmother had/are starting with dementia. Afflicted with anxiety disorder atm. Very eager to save brain and live a long healthy life. Grateful to you all for your knowledge and kindness!
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SusanJ
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Re: My year of anxiety and insomnia

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Chrisweides wrote:Sadly, either mental illness (depression and anxiety) which I am suffering from for many years or perimenopause or my hashimotos has gotten the best of me last year and I have had the most terrible year of my life.
I am so sorry that you've had a terrible year. Hugs to you.

If I might make a suggestion. Try to find a local NAMI group and start attending. Those local groups have so many people who have been there, or are family members of those struggling, and it is a great group to find ideas, competent doctors (those in the trenches know the local doctors who can actually help) and the support you need from those who know what you are facing. If it's just too hard to go it alone, maybe a friend or family member might go with you.

A family member of mine was able to find a very competent psychiatrist through a local NAMI group, who correctly diagnosed him as bipolar (not depression, so his depression meds did not help at all and actually made it worse) and was able to find solutions that worked to improve sleep, after many, many years of fragmented, and too few hours of sleep. Honestly, I think it saved his life. The psychiatrist also found he was hypothyroid, and was the first doctor to ever look at that marker!

Please know there is likely a doctor out there who can help, do stay in touch and let me know how it's going.
Chrisweides
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Re: My year of anxiety and insomnia

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Thank you Susan. I really appreciate your help. I feel so bad and on too of this, of course I know it all makes my Alzheimer risk worse which doesn’t help. Could you ask your family member what exactly improved his sleep? You could maybe pm me. I feel I need to go to the doctor armed with knowledge.

I keep hoping to get well again and be able to reverse a lot of the damage.

I am not from the US, so I think the Nami route is out. There is no Nami here. And as to competent doctors, where I live you can be glad if you find any doctor…most won’t accept new patients. The need is great and they are all overwhelmed, same with psychologists.

Actually I have also wondered if I am misdiagnosed seeing antidepressants make it a lot worse. Adhd would be my suspect. It is much underdiagnosed in women let alone older women.
51 years old. APO E3/4. Mother, grandmother and great grandmother had/are starting with dementia. Afflicted with anxiety disorder atm. Very eager to save brain and live a long healthy life. Grateful to you all for your knowledge and kindness!
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SusanJ
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Re: My year of anxiety and insomnia

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Chrisweides wrote:You could maybe pm me. I feel I need to go to the doctor armed with knowledge.
I will message you with some info.
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