Welcome pineapplesage,pineapplesage wrote: ↑Sun Jul 16, 2023 8:16 pm It might! It's driven me into a pit of despair.
My motivational collapse started last month. I was listening to a talk on brain health while searching for where to buy grass-finished beef and A2 dairy, when I heard Steve Gundry explain why I should avoid the few vegetables I enjoy.
And that was it. He maligned the cucumber and I broke. Because it's all so hard.
When I got my test results, I immersed myself in the universe of science-based prevention recommendations. I adopted many of them: intermittent fasting, intranasal insulin, cold plunges. I grow my own greens, honor my circadian rhythm and avoid alcohol, mouth-breathing, and evening blue light. The hardest things for me are the things that matter the most - avoiding carbs and exercising routinely.
Here's where the self-loathing kicks in. One would think that having watched my grandfather and mother spend the last 12 years of their lives shriveling away in a nursing home from this disease would serve as more than enough motivation to adopt changes I should be doing anyway. What about my ever-present fear that, by the time my daughter (an only child) reaches her mid-twenties, she'll have watched the disease gobble up both her mother's personhood and assets and she'll live with the knowledge that it will likely do the same to her.
And yet, at this very moment, I'm sitting here typing while my phone wants me to exercise off a glucose spike. I've never been so unmotivated to do anything. Something as basic as eating a meal has become a lonely, living nightmare. The changes I have been able to keep are not fun, expensive, and probably of negligible value. I feel like this genetic information has turned me into a miserable freak.
I don't want to give up. I want to be like everyone else on this forum - optimistic, comfortable with and enthusiastic about my regimen, getting jazzed about research, etc. How do I get there?
Thank you for joining our site and posting in the forum. I am so happy to see that NF52 and Beatrice have provided such insightful and compassionate feedback already! I also admire your bravery and honesty in sharing your feelings and thoughts in such and open and honest way. It can overwhelming to process all the information and suggestions for how adapt your lifestyle. If you are open.. I might suggest that both focusing a little bit each day on thanking yourself for the things you are doing (intermittent fasting, intranasal insulin, cold plunges, growing your own greens, avoiding alcohol, ect) and the things you are grateful for in your life can be powerful in keeping us from going down the rabbit hole. You are doing a great job and we can always make adjustments as we move forward. Nancy made such a good point about having joy and enjoying the things in our life today. APOE4 in not a life sentence.. There are many people enjoying full and cognitively healthy lives in there 60-70s and beyond that carry the gene. We know so much more about lifestyle and major factors that can influence the activation of those genes (or not) and it sounds like you are implementing so many good practices already. Having compassion for yourself and treating yourself with kindness and patience is so important. None of us will be perfect in every moment.. nor is there a defined "perfect" protocol for everyone.
As a Support Team Intern, I can also share several tools & resources to help you get the most out of your experience if you would like to explore the site in more detail. The Primer is a detailed and informative resource written by a practicing M.D. with ApoE4/4. It includes information about the biochemistry of the ApoE4 gene and offers a variety of research-based prevention strategies.
Some helpful tips to navigate the site include the How-To Guide. It includes topics such as navigating the forum, private messaging, and searching. One great tip is using the quote (") button when replying to a post. Using the button will automatically alert the member of your response.
If you are interested in learning more about other members check out Our Stories.
Again, I am so glad you joined our forum. I look forward to hearing from you again in the future. Please feel free to reach out here anytime. It's important to have a support system and this forum is full of knowledgeable and compassionate people that are have been in your shoes and we are all here to give each other a lift!
Warmly,
Angie