Renlets: Your words about seeing me and my pain made me cry. Thank you so much!!! That should be what doctors tell patients all the time. I bet that would make a huge difference. And thank you for the resources, I will look through everything.
Tincup: The resources on breathing were quite interesting, thank you so much. Sometimes we forget simple things in the search of a solution.
NF52: You are wonderful, thank you for your feedback. And I commend you on turning your focus on yourself and your family. You can try helping someone, but you cannot do it for them. I had a similar situation with my sibling, but some time ago I sat down, analyzed our whole relationship and realized there is nothing I should feel guilty about, that was a big relief.
I have been upset about the gene finding the last few days, testing my memory, trying to give myself new tasks at work, etc. but decided to give myself a break for now. I have enough reasons for minor memory gaps for now: my mind frequently goes in circles due to anxiety and pain, I have a four year old full of energy, and I have been very uncomfortable with my rigid diet—that’s not forever, I can survive without flavor for a few months

I have a Lyme test coming up. If it’s negative, I should stop searching and focus on all the good information you have shared.
Thank you again.
Best,
K